india immersion
on living with indian housemates
the smell of spices overtook me as i entered my apartment. to the left, a 3-drawer cabinet. one for onions, one for garlic, one for potatoes. a cabinet of lentils, sorted like the rainbow. a spice bento box with garam masala, mustard seeds, tumeric, chili powder, cumin seeds, and coriander.
a few months ago, i moved in with indian international classmates. in this time, i've learned to materialize naan, paratha, roti, chicken tikka and paneer from scratch.
we've spent late nights riffing memey chinese music and bollywood music, watching life of pi, 3 idiots, slumdog millionaire, laughing at the way china and india stereotype each other in chandni chowk to china and kung fu yoga.
i've brought them to experience the fish section at 99 ranch. we've compared our cultural carbohydrates. i tried to be vegetarian for a week and failed. youtube thinks i'm indian.
we've laughed at the way yoga became so white-washed and prada plagiarism of indian kolhapuri sandals. i realized that the gilded age aesthetic was indian patterns.
they've given me an indian name – disha, or ‘direction.’ after the way my english name is pronounced in chinese, '左南西', or 'left south west.'
before living with my housemates, i didn't really understand indian culture because there wasn't much representation in the american media.
i began to realize how few spaces there are to immerse ourselves safely in another culture. not just only in the language, but in the smells and foods and music and emotions that we all share. its this same cultural difference i felt when i first left communities that i grew up in that were almost completely east asian.
i used to feel a lot of discomfort being around people that were very different from me, but these days i view it as a chance to grow. the only way to learn is by being around people not like you.
what i've been up to
i'm taking a special effects makeup class this fall. on the first day of the class, the teacher took a picture of our face, printed it out, and told us to trace it. i've never looked at my face so closely and thought about what might change with age. i’m excited to pretend to be an older me and other variations of me
i was brave enough to sign up for an acting class this semester... every thing else in life feels easier now that i'm taking an acting class. on the first day of class, the teacher was like 'by understanding acting, you're understanding humans' and i realized right on the first day of class that even if i never become an actor, i’m not going to be the same after this class
i watched a lot of movies recently. singin' in the rain, the curious case of benjamin button, paper heart, anastasia, elio, the life of chuck, together... i'm starting to recognize movies on the bookshelves at stores and libraries. actors are starting to reappear in different movies. i’m starting to feel an obligation to write reviews on letterboxd
i'm trying to figure out what to do with my life next year. i love to write and tell stories and write satire but i don't know how to convert these skills into something in the world on a larger scale that is still real and true to myself. i spend some days at a loss, and other days feeling extremely lucky i have a choice