implicit censorship

freedom is elusive

there's a lot of rules and influences that are invisible, not explicitly said but implied.

it's not written anywhere that it is censored, but it is so much harder to get to it that you probably will never see it.

the archives on campus aren't censored, but you're only able to access it on thursdays or by very limited appointments.

you can take the cooler grad school classes, but you'll just have to take a 30 minute shuttle off campus to get there if you want to.

this building is accessible to all, it just is hidden in the room in the corner that has no signage on the door to know what it is.

you can take any electives you want, they just will be in the basement of a building out of your way and at the most ungodly awful times in the evening or early morning.

the 1970 copy of the cmu yearbook isn’t censored, it just is the only copy of the yearbook unscanned and you’ll have to access it in person. and when you see it in person you realize it’s censored because its saying the truth about the school.

this show isn't censored, you just can't watch it on any streaming platforms. you'll have to buy a dvd from a third party source and it'll take extra long to ship.

this movie isn't censored, it's just on a tape that is on an outdated machine and you'll have to find a nonexistent mechanic to fix it before looking at the information.

this piece of old media isn't censored, but it will cost $250 to digitize and you'll have to fill out three different forms before even watching the file to know you want it digitized.

this information is available to all, it just is hidden on the fifth google page that you'll probably not click on.

the news is accessible to everyone, you just have to pay each month to get past the annoying digital wall.

you can go pursue a research path and fight the good battle. but you will make less money. and you will probably be naturally selected away by not having the stable income to afford leaving offspring so your genes will more likely cease to exist.

i think about all the lost pieces of information, all the claims of 'free speech' and 'no censorship' we have in this nation. i think of how much of a lie that is, how much i'm deluding myself into thinking it is actually free. and it makes me so sad.

i think of aaron swartz and how he fought with his life to unlock the research journals from jstor, how we assert democracy is the answer but resort to totalitarian governments online, how we've been okay with child labor in roblox, how corruption exists and re-emerges in different forms that creep up on us.

i think of how capitalism took over all the mmo’s i loved growing up, how their economies collapsed because of this. i think of how many more capitalistic economies will eventually collapse just as my childhood virtual worlds did. i wonder when the virtual earthquake will strike, when the machine will fully break down and cease to work. slowly, then all at once.

is it up to us to overthrow it once it has become too much? scratch it all and start anew? is the only way to fix a problem by running away again and again?

into space. into cyberspace. into the wild. reminding ourselves of a world where it was once free. forever dreaming of the new and elusive ‘land of the free and home of the brave.’