chronicles of valentine's day past

what if valentines day was just a psyop to sell more chocolate and flowers

valentine’s day is such a weird holiday. the pressure to have emotions towards another human being feels insurmountable. i hate it.

i’ve never had a ‘successful’ valentine’s day but it is nice to reflect on what happened each year on this day. my writing teacher calls this ‘chronicles of valentine’s day past.’

pre-2011: too young to care about love but enjoyed delicious chocolates that would go on sale post-valentine’s day

2011: fourth grade. a guy confessed he liked me. i never had that happen until this point. he sat next to me in class. i didn’t like him back so i told him that. he was sad. i didn’t realize i broke his heart because i never liked him. 

2012: fifth grade. we had valentine's day candy grams for sale. i got an anonymous one from an admirer but never figured out who it was. 

2013-2018: sixth grade. i liked this guy who sat next to me. he was good at playing saxophone. i decided to learn saxophone too. i sat next to him in band high school junior year. nothing actually ever happened between us but i admired him.

2019: my first boyfriend bought me a gift. i don’t really remember what it was but was thrilled at the time

2020: i broke up with my first boyfriend and was depressed at home during covid and still getting over him. he wasn’t worth the tears

2021: i was doing a hackathon online and we ended up winning the grand prize! i basically dated my computer that day. it was a fine time.

2022: i scheduled dinner with a friend in NYC since we both were free and didn’t have other plans. halfway through the dinner I realized it was valentine’s day

2023: was a normal day, don’t think i acknowledged it was valentine’s day

2024: i guess this is one way to acknowledge valentine’s day

carnegie mellon fence today